‘FED’ UP YET?
WE ARE FROM THE GOVERNMENT AND WE ARE HERE TO HELP YOU!
What kind of problems are you having that your government can help you with?
Did you make a mistake and register to vote in the “wrong” political party? Let our Auditors with the IRS show you ways to get those political donations routed to the “right” party so there won’t be any unpleasant questions about your tax returns.
Did you “accidentally” attend one of those Pro-Constitution” public rallies? Let our folks with the Justice Department do a little “background” checking for you to make sure you are not getting in with the “wrong” crowd. They will be happy to visit with your family, neighbors and friends. Anything they turn up will be held in strict confidence and only shared with other helpful government agencies.
Do you own a business and “forgot” to make a contribution to the political party in power? Your friends from the Environmental Protection Agency will be pleased to visit your place of business to help you comply with all 60,000 pages of Regulations. Including all the sub-paragraphs and addendums which you are responsible to comply with. (Helpful hint: You might want to keep your checkbook nearby.)
Having trouble keeping healthy or maybe have a Body Mass Index that does not comply with current government guidelines? The Health & Human Services Department under the powers granted by the Affordable Care Act, and with the assistance of the Internal Revenue Service, will be glad to review your eating and drinking choices. They will have available all the helpful data provided by your credit card companies and those popular “Club” and “Member Rewards” cards from your favorite stores, restaurants and “other” places of “indulgence”. And, they will be supported by the Justice Department.
Now there is that pesky First Amendment to the Constitution which prohibits Congress from making any laws which infringe upon your rights of Freedom of Speech and Freedom of the Press.
But, of course they won’t be making any such laws.
The Government doesn’t need them. After all, they are only here to help you!
Bob Bandy
